Happy Winter Solstice 2016!

I'm packing today, because we're leaving tomorrow for two and a half weeks - we're visiting our families for Christmas and New Year. This of course means I have to decide what cards to take with me. I decided on this:

Crystal Tarot and Jodorowsky-Camoin Tarot de Marseille

Jodo-Camoin is my all purpose deck I couldn't part with and from Crystal (that I also love a lot) I'm pulling cards for Sacred Days Of Yule Spread by June Kaminski. I started yesterday and plan on continuing till December 31st, so I need the deck with me. I might also do some New Year spreads with it, we'll see!

1. Mother Night of Dreams: - Dec 20th This card reminds us to look for a particular message in our dreams tonight. The ancients believed that our dreams on this night foretold some of the important events in the coming year.

I pulled out 4 of Cups.

To be honest, I didn't feel like my dreams were very profound. I did see my grandfather in the dream and he was telling me that all the signs show that the winter will be very cold. We'll see about that!

2. Yule - Winter Solstice: - Dec 21st This card shows us how best to connect to the Light within and without - it symbolizes the Birth of the Sun.

Today I got 9 of Wands.

I probably should focus on looking for new paths and new ways. I think it's a good message for the new year, especially because that's exactly what I intend on doing. Five of the Wands form a pentagram - it can be a suggestion that I will be under protection and guidance in my search, so I can proceed without worries.

Reading outside in December - tips

My first tip about reading outside is: if you only can, do it! It's a great experience and the message sounds clearer, when you're surrounded by nature. At least that's how it is for me.

Last weekend I went to read outside twice. It's December already, so I got quite cold after a while, but it was totally worth it.

If it's cold outside, I recommend taking something you can sit on (in my case it was a thick, reusable grocery bag :)) and a piece of cloth to spread your cards on (that's no matter what season you have, you always want to protect your cards). Fingerless mittens are a good solution for shuffling cards in the cold - paper gets surprisingly cold! Depending on how long you're planning to be out, you might take a thermos with hot tea or coffee inside. Plus a pen and a journal to write down your readings!

Card Number IX - The Hermit

I did some musings about this card before, but did not post them here. Recently I get The Hermit quite often, so I thought I would write a post about him. Also (and that is the main reason, hehe) I found that a Japanese picture I kept on my refrigerator for quite a while resembles the card and I'm very inspired by Enrique Enriquez idea of seeing tarot in the world around us.

VIIII L'Hermite from Tarot de Marseille, ukiyo-e lady with a lantern, IX The Hermit from Crystal Tarot.

What I struggled with was that 9 is a number I associate with birth - it's the number of months of human pregnancy. Instead of a newborn baby, however, we get a grandpa dressed in a habit. He has a lantern: maybe he's awaking to a new life? Birth is also a shock and a kind of trauma to the baby that was in the darkness and comfy for whole their life. The Hermit is withdrawn and he's looking at the life he left in the past. He has a walking stick - he'll soon walk on, but he still wants a glance at his old shell he's leaving behind.

In the card we can see an old man, round-shouldered with age. Where is he going to in the winter of his life? Maybe he wants to show to other people what he's discovered? His hood is off his head - he's ready for new ideas.

The Hermit is an ascetic, he practices in solitude. He's not afraid to meet his inner self. Isolating himself is to help him find God and himself too.

The counterpart of IX The Hermit is XIX The Sun. The small lantern he's holding will turn into huge celestial body. In The Hermit you're learning alone, in solitude. In The Sun you've got company, you're learning from others. You can see God in another human being and you're much closer to the end of your journey than you were in The Hermit.

In the spreads the card can mean wisdom, experience, solitude, old age, being isolated.

Positive sides: wisdom, experience, self-determination.

Negative sides: loneliness, lack of understanding from others, tiredness.

Card number XV - The Devil

I've written a post where I put some of my thoughts on this cards before, you can find it here.

Today I pulled a card for meditation and it was XV The Devil. And I had some new thoughts.

There's that song by Elvis Presley that I like a lot, "Devil In Disguise" and I did listen to it while writing this post. Devil - the Prince Of Lies, master of deceit... Yeah, I actually think that the Devil is one of the most truthful cards in the deck.

Why is that?

First of all, the tarot Devil rubs our faces in the truths we would prefer to not know about ourselves. He says: "look, look at all this ugliness and awkwardness! Look how false you are". His role is also to unmask false people around us. He points to them, warning us against them. That's because he knows all about baaad things. Look at these three cards: intererstingly the Devil figure has wings on each of them. He is the fallen angel - he has experienced both heaven and hell. He knows it all.

XV The Devil from Crystal Tarot, Jodorowsky-Camoin TdM, Jaśniak Tarot.

What I like about The Devil too, is that sometimes you can interpret him as a card telling you to laugh people in the faces, show them your tongue. Don't care for appearances. Let them be shocked and don't let them chain you up. Also, very important: don't be so serious about yourself all the time! Have a good laugh sometimes :D

And listen to Elvis.

Expressiveness of TdM

Before Tarot de Marseille started talking to me, I wouldn't have thought how talkative it can be! After all, there are no people on number cards. But let me just share an example of a reading I have just recently experienced.

The question was why a certain person acts in a certain way towards the querent. I got three pip cards (oh noes!) and the message was in fact very clear.

I got 4/Swords, 8/Swords, 9/Coins. Each and every card has something trapped inside! A flower, a precious coin... imprisoned. The person is feeling hurt, vulnerable, not ready to take part in wordly things. After the reading I got a confirmation that it is actually true. Those chatty pips!

St. Catherine's Eve

It's St. Catherine's Eve today! In the old Polish tradition, it's the time for fortune telling - particularly for unmarried men, about their future wives. Since I'm neither a man nor unmarried, I decided it's just a good time for fortune telling. And my tarot agrees with me!

I did a daily draw today and here's what I got: 7/Coins, XVIII The Moon, III The Empress + Queen/Swords.

I think it's about leaving the mundane for a bit (7/Coins) to go deeper into the intuitive world (XVIII). Perfect time for divination! The two women of the last two cards correspond with two dogs/wolves from The Moon. The floral motif from 7/Coins lookes like the crayfish. Everythig is pointing to the XVIII card.

Also the Empress struck me as very resembling of St. Catherine that I saw on a painting. The crucifix/scepter with a cross, the crown, holding a wheel/shield, being royal... She lacks the sword, but look, the helpful Queen is handing it to her!

M&L?

With my tarot passion rekindled, my hunger for new decks has also awoken. To to be expected.

I managed, however, to stop myself from buying new tarot decks - I've ordered two oracle decks instead! Can't wait to receive them. They will be my first ever oracle deck experience.

The dangerous thing is, my old unconsummated love for a tarot deck is alive again. I have a weak spot for decks that are pieces of art and this one is just... I can't put it into words. I mean the "Mary-El Tarot". I looked at it on the Internet many times loving it, but I never bought it because I had the feeling it won't work for me as a regular reading deck. Like I ask a question and get all those seraphim, firey lions and I totally don't get the message. However, now I've started to think I could do some meditations with it, using also the companion book it comes together with. I could expose myself to this stunning imagery putting a card on the desk and so on.

Then I asked my Tarot de Marseille about the matter. The question for the upper row was "how would my meditations with 'Mary-El Tarot' go?". I got 3/Coins, Le Mat, 7/Coins. For the lower row: "what would the effect be?". I got 2/Wands, Ace/Wands, King/Cups and additional card to see what he's looking at: 9/Swords.

It looks surprisingly promissing! Like I will start a whole new thing and I will feel uncertain and unsure, but also excited and will have the feeling I'm gaining something.
It would help me overcome some blockades (2/Wands being crashed by the huge branch of the Ace) and allow me to analyze my emotions (King/Cup looking at 9/Swords).
Oh, man... Now I have to get it, don't I?

Different faces of the Star

Hello everyone!

Somewhere deep inside I knew I would come back. It's been over a year since my last post. There were various things going on in my life and tarot was not so present during that time. But now I feel that it's time to come back to tarot world.

I have calculated my year card for 2016 (by adding the day and moth of my birthday to the numerals of 2016) and it seems it's XVII The Star. It honestly seems right, because then 2015 was XVI The Tower and 2014 XV The Devil. These were very difficult years for me, and full of radical changes. I'm still recovering. And when I looked at The Star from my favorite Tarot de Marseille deck, it looked to me like she's pouring a lot of dirty water to the sewer. I know it's against the traditional view of crystal clear water... But that's how it looked to me at the time. She's cleansing her life. I need to get rid of many painful things and take the next step.

I took the Star cards from most of my decks and spread them on the table. They all seem to be saying the same thing (except for the "1001 Nights Tarot", but this deck doesn't talk to me anyway).

2017 should be XVIII The Moon... Shoud I worry?

A new book

My new tarot book has arrived!

It's "Tarot. The Open Reading" by Yoav Ben-Dov. In this book he explains his way of reading tarot - what interests me the most is his way of reading the pips (although I'm sure the other chapters will be very interesting as well). He seems to use a visual way to assign meanings to the pips, e.g.:

"4 of Swords - Restriction. The static number 4 brings out the blocking and limiting aspect of the Swords. Two pairs of curved swords create a solid border around the center. In the middle, a branch in side view completely fills the enclosure. It looks constrained, with a narrow top flower and the tip of the right-hand leaf touching the swords. Emerging on the left of the branch is what seems like a tiny white berry on a stalk". Then he gives interpretation for the card in the upright and reversed position.

Looks interesting! More on the topic when I've read the book!

Both the CBD Tarot (Tarot de Marseille restored by Dr. Yoav Ben-Dov) and the Jodo-Camoin deck I own are restored from the Conver deck, so they are similar enough for me to use my deck to work with this book :)

As your heart dictates

It is known that sometimes tarot can be very literal.

I asked the cards what I should do in one situation and I loved the answers so much! Well, it's my interpretation, but here goes. 

What should I do? The answer was very literal to me.
7 of Wands, Ace of Cups, 4 of Wands

Do (7=The Chariot, action + Wands) as your heart (Ace of Cups) dictates (4=The Emperor, command + Wands).
And so I did :)

TdM reflections - XIIII TEMPERANCE and XXI LE MONDE

Temperance is one of virtues, but that's very abstract, so let's see what is visible on the card. There's an angel - a symbol of goodness. He (or she) has two jugs - just like XVII The Star. These jugs look very similar indeed. Maybe the angel is preparing some liquid for the Star to pour over? I will have to think about it when I stop by card XVII...

The angel teaches us about patience (you have to be patient to pour the liquid so that you don't spill a drop!), focusing on our tasks.

How is this angel connected to IIII The Emperor? The angel, like the Emperor, is controlling the situation, but in a more understanding way. He/she is leading us by setting an example, not pressing us to follow the lead. The angel has wings, so the card might be a hope for us - that even if now we feel trapped or oppressed, there will be a chance to break free.

There's an angel also on XXI The World card. We have all the "beast" symbols traditionally connected to the four Evangelists: a lion (Mark), an eagle (John), a bull (Mark) and an angel (Matthew). They all have an older and complex meaning, but let's stop at that. What is interesting, one of the creatures - the bull - has no halo, although all the other have. It's just like Coins court differs from other three (no numerals on pips) and Jodorowsky suggests the creatures symbolize the courts: the lion - Wands, the eagle - Swords, the angel - Cups and the bull - Coins. And the lady in the middle? She's probably the spirit of Major Arcana...

Oh, and an important thing: she's often described as "androgynous", but what I see here is definitely a lady! I know there were such representations of Christ, but here I see a woman.

The World, number XXI, is connected to I Magician and XI Strength. Even visually: the naked woman holds similar objects in her hands that Le Bateleur has and there's a beast and a lady, like on the Strength card. The Wolrd is the completion of the journey, but it means also new beginnings (as connected to number 1). It means we have all the resources we need and now it's time to act. The world will be on our side.

TdM Majors reflections - VI LAMOVREVX and XX LE IUGEMENT

Some people say, that VI The Lover is about making a choice, so it's not a happy card. He has to - they say - choose between two women. I wouldn't say so. OK, I fancy the idea with two goddesses that appeared before Hercules and also Achilles and gave the hero a choice of a long and quiet life or a short but glorious one. The hero always choses the latter, otherwise he wouldn't be a hero. That's all nice - but what does it have to do with LOVE?
The woman on our right has flowers in her head - the sign of youth. The one on the left - laurel leaves, that also the Queen of Wands bears, the sign of wisdom and knowledge (like the laurels on philosopher's head). I personally like to see this scene as a young man joining with the one he loves (the flower lady), being blessed by his mother (wise laurel lady). She's pushing him towards the bride. The Lover leaves his mother to be with his new wife - an event very important in our lives. His love gives him strength and shines over his path (the cupid and the sun above).
The need to choose I see more in Ace of Swords. So VI The Lover is about things we love or like, about pleasure and fancy -  and therefore the sixes in Minor Arcana as well.

I have sometimes problems with interpreting XX Judgment. It appears in most unexpected situations in my readings. Let's see what this card shows.
The scene depicts biblical resurrection - the angel with the trumpet, people going out of their graves. The angel sends divine power from Heaven to Earth and people come back to life. So the card can be about restarting something, coming back to things long lost or forgotten. It can also mean "the call" or some "news" to us. It also gives hope - that we shouldn't give up.

Both cards have an angel above (if we call the cupid an angel), sending divine energy down to us. They remind us we're not alone in this world, that there's someone or something leading us - if we only want to listen to that divine voice.

TdM Majors reflections - VIII LA JUSTICE and XVIII LA LUNE

I often have problems with interpreting VIII Justice, not only in TdM. She's somehow transparent to me, a "you get what you deserve" card.
But let's see who we have here. We see a lawful and powerful woman. She's ruthless with her sword and in that she reminds me of Queen of Swords. She probably has less feelings and more respect for the law and rules. Her elbow, however, disturbs me. She's bending the scales... She could do that to help you, but also to take advantage on you. But maybe she wants to show us, that justice is not only about cold and dry law. It's possible to something against the rules and still do the right thing.

Now we have number XVIII, LA LUNE. It correlates to VIII as the opposite, I think. I like this card a lot, even though it often shows me difficult or sad things.
Justice is the world of the sunlight and order - and The Moon shows us the night and chaos. As we know, dynamic the chaos is more fertile than orderly proper environment. The world of LA LUNE is home to all about ourselves that we cannot explain, that we don't ourselves understand. There are illusions and dreams, there is depression, but there is also special wisdom coming from the abyss of our soul.
The two towers on the card... I imagine the scene is taking place outside of city walls - outside the orderly world. The animals, creatures of instinct, take control. The Moon shines on everything and everyone, not distinguishing between creatures and objects.
I really love this card.

LA JUSTICE is the radiant creature that casts a shadow - LA LUNE. They cannot be separated. Only together they catch balance. Without The Moon, Justice would lack depth and understanding of human motives. Without Justice, The Moon would disintegrate in chaos, in insanity.

How should I treat myself these days?

Recently I had a hard time in my life and made my family worry a lot - and also to help me a lot. I'm feeling like I should recover as fast as I can, so I won't be a burden anymore, but there are some moments when I overdo things and thus I experience a breakdown from time to time. I asked my cards how I should treat myself these days and indeed they showed me that I haven't recovered yet.

I pulled 9 of Coins, 3 of Coins, Page of Cups.

I should realize I'm still weak and I have health issues (as 9 is connected to VIIII The Hermit, an old man, and to the physical world in Coins). I should take care of myself and try to built my health back (3 - III The Empress - growth and Coins again). I shouldn't treat myself too harshly or blame myself. Instead I should relax more, be more understanding and treat myself more like a defenseless child (pure Page of Cups).

TdM Majors reflections - XV LE DIABLE and IIII L'EMPEREUR

I wanted to write down some reflections on the Tarot de Marseille Majors. I chose XV that I like a lot and IIII that I don't really like. I thought it a good exercise and opportunity to think deeper about the cards. Tarot de Marseille catches my heart by it's minimalistic look, but there's the Devil in the details!

 I must admit, I absolutely love LE DIABLE card from TdM! First of all, it's totally weird and thus making a person uneasy. It warns us about indulging in carnal pleasures, but also shows how deeply the flesh and its desires are connected to our human nature. The two horned creatures hide their hands - hands, with which we can perform so many things animals cannot. The creatures go into the world of animal instincts. We're bound to this devil/goddess and denying it, averting our eyes won't make it disappear. Moreover - it would make matters worse. Denying our own nature is lying to ourselves and stops us from finding illumination. Only after we acknowledge needs of the flesh, after we learn to respect them, can we go further on our path.

Personally I think this card holds an important lesson for me, for I used to dismiss needs of the body as less crucial to my development.

 Whenever I see the L'EMPEREUR card, I sigh inwardly. It seems that I'm a numerological Four and somehow it doesn't make me happy. I have a feeling Fours are boring, down-to-earth and stubborn. No place for imagination and adventure. I subconsciously see the Emperor as an oppressing ruler, who always wants to have his way. I'd like to find in me some warmer feelings for him.

The Emperor is well organized and likes to plan in advance, what let's him to be in control of his life. He has a strong personality and shows the way for others, he's leading the way. He learns from past events (he's facing left, the "past" direction) and uses this knowledge to built better future. In my Jodorowsky-Camoin deck (I'm using the CBD TdM in this post - it's great quality, it's free for non-comercial use and webpage-friendly! Thank you, Yoav Ben-Dov!) his eagle sits on the egg we previously see with LA PAPESSE: the Emperor builds his rule on wisdom and wise counseling.

Monthly read - August

I know that I have promised to use a different deck each month, but then I went back home for a couple of months and took only my Jodo-Camoin deck... So here it goes, Tarot de Marseille again.

Atmosphere of the month: 10 of Coins

Health: Knight of Wands, IV Emperor

Family: 5 of Wands, 6 of Cups

Hobby: 5 of Coins, Page of Cups

Friends: XVII The Star

As opposed to lonely July, in August my husband joined me, so my dreams turned into flesh (10 of Cups).

My health will be more stable and I will be much more energetic (Knight/Wands, Emperor). I will be under protection of my family and surrounded by loving people (5/Wands, 6/Cups). As for my hobbies, maybe it will be a time for starting things that I liked anew (5/Coins, Page/Cups). Friends will be pouring to my place, visiting me :) (The Star).

Monthly read - July

Recently I'm working with Tarot de Marseille again, so I used it also for my monthly read. It's a Jodorowsky&Camoin deck.

My first experience with TdM was difficult - I couldn't find my way of reading it, didn't actually "hear" what it was saying. Recently however, after a long break, when I started all over again, something changed and I feel more from the cards. Also  I seem to need less cards to get a message. For example, for my monthly reads I used to pull three cards for every topic. When I pulled from TdM, one card was enough to tell me something (in this month's case, only the "family" part needed more explanation).

So...

Atmosphere of the month, important matters: XVI The Tower (again!)

Health: Knight of Coins

Family: 4 of Wands, 7 of Wands, 7 of Coins

Hobby: 2 of Wands

Friends: 4 of Coins

The Tower from TdM is different than from RWS style decks. It shows me some sort of liberation, being relieved. I'm under a lot of stress now and that may change in July, because I'm visiting my family and staying with them for a longer period.

My health will also improve (Knight/Coins).

My family will be supportive, but some frictions are also possible.

Hobby: is see knitting needles here!

My friends will be visiting me, they will surround me like the coins surround the rectangle in the center.

I've made a Fool for myself

I'm really enjoying "The Way of Tarot" by A. Jodorowsky and M. Costa. I expected it to be harder to read, but when I started, I couldn't stop! It's very interesting, although I do not agree with every line written there - but again, tarot is a very personal thing. And this book made me appreciate Tarot de Marseille pictures more... I used to see them as ugly, but now I understand their sublime beauty. Also, the cards restored by Caimon and Jodorowsky are marvelous in my opinion. Maybe one day I'll buy them... I have a Fournier edition of TdM and in comparison it looks so stripped of details! And the lines are not as clean as those needle-sharp lines from Caimon-Jodorowsky cards.

When I read the "monologue of The Fool", I felt that the essence of this card is what I'm lacking right now.
"Do not be afraid of freeing the instinct, no matter how primitive. Going beyond the rational does not mean denying the mental force: be open to the poetry of intuition, to flashes of telepathy, to voices that do not belong to you, to words that come to you from another dimension...".

Although I'm reading tarot, although I'm trying to be open, the control of the intellect is very strong in me. So - on an impulse - I decided to redraw the card "Le Mat".

In "The Way of Tarot" there are reproductions of all the Major Arcana in large scale. So first I took tracing paper and traced the image by pencil. Then I turned it to its back to trace it from behind - so I could transfer it to a piece of paper. Of course I made a mistake and transferred the mirrored image instead, then the right way. But the lines were not very visible anymore. Thus I had to draw it very carefully...

Then I painted the image with watercolours, using the colour pattern from Caimon-Jodorowsky edition and with a nib and ink I drew the outlines.

Almost finished:

The result. All in all I drew every line FOUR times!